Jeff Adams

Lobby about a month ago

Surely you have heard of  or participated in prayer walks that have become very popular over the past years. Tonight was absolutely wonderful as we did a prayer walk through KCBT’s new campus expansion as part of our Tuesday night prayer ministry.

Executive Pastor Jeff Cox shared some of the lessons that God has been teaching him through this process. Jeff has led the team that God has used to make this dream a reality. This evening he shared how God has been teaching him faith. He showed us one of the Bible’s dynamic paradoxes in Philippians.

Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure. (Philippians 2:12-13)

We are to work out our salvation, but it is God who is working in us. It is fascinating that God never really explains this tension. He just presents it and expects us to accept its truth.

Jeff went on to share the hard work of his team and complemented that with the many evidences of God’s miraculous provision through this whole process. I’ll share some of those Sunday in the dedication.

Following that, we moved into the new lobby to begin our prayer walk. I sneaked out and went ahead so I could be standing just past the door as people entered. What fun! Their expressions and comments were priceless!

The crowd divided up into small teams and went room to room as they prayed. I stayed alone so as to be available to help, answer questions, and, most importantly, to be able to go around and watch their reactions and listen to their comments.

Here’s the evidence of a great design and mission accomplished – no one wanted to leave! Everyone just stood around and talked. I am SO excited and can’t wait for Sunday!!! You don’t want to miss this.

From Berlin Wall

A friend and her husband saw those words on a bumper sticker recently. I love it! Most of us don’t like change and many of us fight it, but it is indeed inevitable. Change is one of God’s “growth agents,” designed to prompt us toward growth. Sadly, many of us dig in our heels and waste precious opportunities to grow.

Yesterday I was musing about sources of truth in our lives and the need to expand our frame of reference as to how God communicates with us. God is, of course, the ultimate Source. Everything stems from him. He is truth and he reveals his truth. He has revealed himself through the scriptures and through Jesus the Christ. He also reveals himself through creation and conscience (Romans 1 for example).  The Bible gives further insight into ways God communicates his truth – not in contradiction of or, in addition to the Bible, but in confirmation of his truth revealed.

Sometimes, our focus become myopic and we fail to see God’s truth reflected in all of the many ways suggested by scripture itself. We fail to see God’s truth in creation, in others, or even in our own innermost being or conscience. Why see the world in black and white when we can see it in color? Snapshots are great, but it’s also great to own the whole DVD in HD.

Grace is another element of growth that I mentioned yesterday along with truth and time. Again, God is the ultimate Source. All grace originates with him. Just as with truth, God disseminates his grace in various manners, though all grace is traceable back to him.

Two powerful passages explain how God uses us to minister his grace to each other – Ephesians 4 and 1Peter 4.  Could it be that God wants to give you a measure of grace, but you fail to see it because he is using another person to give it to you?

Circumstances, people, situations, crisis, change, problems and challenges – when our objective is growth, instead of seeing all of these factors as enemies, we can search for God’s truth and grace in them. With time, we begin to experience the growth that God desires for us.

Change is inevitable; growth is optional. Got growth?

I continue to think about the elements of growth: grace, truth and time. Where does one find grace and truth? Let’s just take truth. Where can we get it?

This is the cue for someone to slap the cowhide cover of their wide margin, black KJV and loudly proclaim, “You find truth in the Bible, Brother!”

Yes. Without doubt. Jesus said to his Father that his word is truth (John 17:17). When we think of truth,  we often think of preaching, teaching and Bible study.  The temptation is to think that all our needs will be met if we just read the Bible and listen to preaching and teaching. That’s a great foundation!

However, if we limit ourselves to preaching, teaching and Bible study as our only source of truth, we eventually limit our growth. When we actually open our Bibles and read them instead of just slapping the cover and repeating pious sayings, we discover that truth is to be found in many places and needs to be in many places. Consider the following examples.

• Finding truth in our innermost beings as we open ourselves to the examination of God’s Spirit. Psalm 51:5; 139:23
• Not just learning the Bible, but learning to live its truth, hold to it and integrate it into daily life. John 8:31-32
• Confessing by telling the truth about who we are. James 5:16
• Speaking the truth to others. Ephesians 4:15, 25
• Being a model of the truth for others and learning truth from the example of others. 1Corinthians 4:16; 11:1
• In a fulfilling relationship with Jesus Christ. Not just reading about Jesus, but getting to know him.  John 1:14, 17; 14:6; Philippians 3:10
• Through what we do in the power of God. John 3:21
• Through the witness of the Spirit. John 15:26; 16:13; Ephesians 5:9; 1John 5:6
• By mutual transparency and accountability. 2Corinthians 4:2

These are some examples of places where we get truth. The authority of the scriptures is foundational to all life. Growth occurs when we not only learn intellectual information about truth in the Bible, but begin to assimilate that truth, integrating it into the reality of daily life.  What are the sources of truth in your life?

“Mary, Mary, quite contrary,

How does your garden grow?

With silver bells and cockle-shells

And pretty maids all in a row!”

If you were raised in an English-speaking environment, there is a good chance you recognize this old English nursery rhyme from Mother Goose. No one is certain of its origin and it comes in several variations. It has also been the object of all sorts of speculation as to hidden meaning and significance – all the stuff of legend and myth.

Our theme this year has been one word – grow. All healthy living organisms grow. If you have been feeling a bit contrary yourself lately, it could be that you need to ask yourself the same type of question that was asked of contrary Mary. How do YOU grow?

I have been reflecting on the theme of human growth as we have moved through this year and am planning a major emphasis this Fall. It is perilous to be too simplistic, but the more I look at this theme, the more convinced I am that human growth has three key elements: grace, truth and time. There are obviously more details and dimensions, but sometimes it is good to reduce things to their most basic elements in order to see the big picture. After all, Jesus once reduced the entire Old Testament to two simple rules: love God with all your heart, mind and soul, and love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:37-40).

Listen to the words of John’s Gospel. In this Gospel that focuses on knowing Jesus as God in human form, the emphasis on his nature is reduced to two elements: grace and truth.

And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth. John 1:14

For the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ. John 1:17

Consider the implications:

• Truth without grace results in legalism. Legalism actually promotes sin and results in the death of true spirituality (Galatians).
• Trying to latch on to grace without truth results in chaotic, out-of-control life with no boundaries.
• Expecting to get grace and truth and have all your problems disappear overnight results in total frustration. Growth takes time.

If there are the biblical elements of growth, then where do you get them? How do you get them? How long does it take to get them? Or, as the nursery rhyme suggests, how do you, as a individual, grow? Don’t just say that you need to read the Bible and pray more. Be specific. Where do you go to get grace, and how? Where do you get truth? How? Are you allowing sufficient time in your life for these elements to take root and grow? What is the role of time in your personal growth?

Sadly, many professing followers of Jesus don’t seem to have the will or the time to grow. They might identify more with the parody of the old nursery rhyme by Roald Dahl in Ryhme Stew.

Mary, Mary, quite contrary
How does your garden grow?
“I live with my brat in a high-rise flat
so how in the world would I know.”

We acquire the strength we overcome – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Yesterday’s comments on grief evidently hit a need. Thanks for the great comments both here and on FaceBook. The interest was high enough that maybe some more thoughts might be of benefit.

In 1969 Dr. Elizabeth Kübler-Ross wrote a landmark book entitled On Death and Dying. There’s a good chance you are somewhat familiar with the five stages of grief, or cycle of grief, that she sets forth in the book. Kübler-Ross aimed to increase sensitivity of those who deal with grieving or dying people.

Remember that people grieve not only upon the death of a loved one, but also grieve the death of a dream, vision, relationship, marriage, career or any other tightly-held emotional attachment. One diagnosed with a terminal disease also goes through a grieving process.  Here are the stages Kübler-Ross observed.

Denial – this can’t be happening to me!

Anger – Why me? This is just not fair?

Bargaining – I’d do anything for a few more years. What if I did __________, then maybe God would, could ________.

Depression – the reality of the loss begins to set in and the person despairs.

Acceptance – in this stage the person begins to come to terms with the loss and is able to move on even though the reality of the loss is always present.

Over the past several decades, researchers have both confirmed and challenged Kübler-Ross’s theory. Google her name and you can spend the rest of the night reading. That discussion is far beyond us, but what I do want to point out is that grief is a natural process of life. It’s not an event; it’s a process. People respond differently to grief even though there may be some commonalities.

These five stages of grief should not be thought of in a simplistic or black/white manner. They are not absolute, but only meant as a guide to what often happens as people grieve. Here are some thoughts about this cycle of grief that would be good to take into account.

• These five stages of grief can be experienced in a matter of a few hours, days, weeks or months. It might be helpful to simply observe where a person is in the process to guide you in your interaction, prayer and help.
• It has been observed that these stages sometimes occur out of sequence, or even simultaneously. A person can go through the entire cycle repeatedly. As I said earlier, these are not absolute and not to be thought of as “five simple steps.” Kübler-Ross herself said that not everyone experiences all five stages, though she believed that everyone goes through at least two. She spoke of a “roller coaster” effect where some people swing from one to the other, often hitting on one stage many times before working through it.
• Understanding that grief is a process, it is advisable not to make long term, life-changing decisions while grieving.
• Yesterday I said that one of the things we can do to help people who are grieving is to lovingly walk with them through the process, not teaching or preaching, but understanding that they are going through a process that requires much unconditional love and acceptance and structure to have space, place and time to experience the grief.
• There is no set or standard time frame for the grief process. People can return to life as normal, but the loss is still very real and always will be. When people get stuck in the grieving process that is when problems can occur. This often happens when we try to fight the natural process of grief, suppress it, deny it or avoid it in some way. That’s what is not normal.

Even once you have processed your grief, you or someone you love may tear up or become a bit depressed on an important anniversary or holiday that holds significance. Sometimes, grief just sneaks up and grabs us with no warning and for no perceived reason.

When any of the above happens, this does not mean that you or anyone else is weak, lacking in faith or too emotional, etc. It means that we are human. If it happens to you, think about passages such as Romans 5:3-5. If it happens to someone close to you, love them; don’t judge them. I’m reading Job at the moment. You don’t want to follow the example of Job’s friends. The book of Job is a clinic on how NOT to help someone in the grieving process.

The Bible is amazingly filled with teaching and examples of human grief and the right and wrong ways to process it. That might make a good study if this is of interest or need to you.